lazybox | izunia lucis callout

Mista--

[What mistake? How could anyone mistake Ardyn? But he looks up at this man, and at the scarf in hand, and back up, squinting, and leans back a little, and then a little farther.]

Whaaaaaat's going on here?

Dude, I've seen cosplay, but not that good.

People keep telling me so. I've considered applying as a stunt double.

[Keep it casual, even as he's just like. Gently. Please take your bags back.]

Mostly I give teen girls heart attacks.

[He barely even notices the bags. Maybe he should let go of that scarf eventually.]

N...o, this is--

Are you wearing a holoprojector?

No?

[He finally reaches up to attempt to gently pull the scarf free of Church's grip.]

Supposedly everyone has a perfect double somewhere in the universe. I'm just lucky enough to share a face with a celebrity, and I occasionally use it to my amusement. Can you let go, that scarf was a gift.

Bullshit. [Is it, though? Genetic variation in humans is obviously not his forte in any sense. He finally lets the scarf go, half blindly grabbing back bags--it feels a little like the world has tilted a few degrees off center, and he's trying to reorient himself.]

Cuz you look--you look just like--

...

Do you ever run into any cosplayers of me?

One or two. Not quite as good - the one I ran into at a convention here had too wide of a nose, but this is just one planet.

[And also didn't have nearly as good a handle on the attitude.]

Am I to assume by your mistake that he's actually -

[A gesture that's just a little too quick to be exactly Ardyn's, at the mall around them.]

running around here somewhere?

I--yeah, I--

[It's hard to take anything at face value, knowing IG7, knowing holographic disguises. Knowing fans, too. He's trying not to be embarrassed, and failing, so he's trying to channel that into...something else and also failing. He's failing at a lot of things.]

Wow, you're just lucky I didn't kiss you or anything.

[Some of us are purists, Church, who accomplish our deceptions without the aid of holograms. Or illusion magic, which he definitely does not have, nope.]

I really appreciate that you did not, though it would be far from the least weird thing that's happened to me.

Aw, c'mon, it would've made it an authentic experience.

And a disaster if the real thing came across us.

[Because even if he can fool Church into thinking he's a mere cosplayer, Ardyn is out of the question. And then there goes his favorite mall, among other things.]

Psh, like two Ardyns hasn't been a fantasy of mine, he'd understand.

[Oh god of course

why is he surprised by this

why is he. literally at all. surprised by this.

This is the exact shape of his life and of course Ardyn would manage to find someone into that.

At least the embarrassed cough and violently red cheeks are un-Ardyn-like enough that they come off as the break in character that they are.]

Not one of mine, so I'll have to disappoint.

Right, maybe not something I should say to a total stranger. Even though, y'know, kinda everyone got to see my fucking love life as it is. Edited, but still. Sssssorry, maybe I should go, ha, find my actual boyfriend who totally didn't abandon me for sweets or wherever the fuck he went to.

Don't worry, I've endured the fanfic writers. You know the ones.

[The ones without any sense of boundaries who immediately try to drag you into playing out their fantasies with them? Yeah those ones.]

And I ought to be getting home, anyway.

[Before Ardyn comes looking for his boyfriend.]

[you rang]

Leonard, darling, Yuuri's looking for you. I think she wants input on what we're cooking to...night...

[Ardyn trailed off midsentence, yellow eyes drifting to the man nearby--and in a fraction of an instant he'd positioned himself between the two just short of falling into a fighting stance, voice dangerously low and with a furious snarl to it that rarely if ever came out these days.]

You. Get the hell away from him, what are you doing here?

[It happens so fast, he barely has time to react. What he does do is wrap his arms around Ardyn's middle as if he could have any hope of actually holding him back if he wants to fight. Maybe don't fight in the middle of the mall?]

Whoa, hey, whoa, calm down, what the hell! We were just talking, it's fine!

[Izunia, meanwhile, is still holding one of their bags. Luckily, it's one of those obscenely tall paper mall bags, so he can just. Gently. Set it down.

While biting back the familiar impulse to tell Ardyn not to cause a scene. Familiar, and useless, because Ardyn pretty much is a scene, wherever he goes.

Think of the devil and he shall appear, truly.

Ardyn's first impulse is to fight - Izunia's is to run, cover blown wide open anyway, and it's a bad crowd for running but a great one for warping away, lots of space streetlights and signs that he could use to just go over the crowd. He fights it down, but not before there's a blue flash between his fingers that will tell all that needs to be told, though the dagger is there only briefly.

He almost can't address Ardyn, so Church, instead, gets eye contact and a small nod.]

It really was a pleasure meeting you. Thank you, for taking care of him.

[By his estimate he's got about fifteen seconds before he's got to run - ]

Take one step and I’ll eviscerate you in broad fucking daylight. You don’t get to run from this, coward.

[The gravelly snarl hadn’t left Ardyn’s voice, but he made no move to pull away or fight out of Church’s grasp. His right hand—wearing a familiar black ring—wrapped light around his arm as if to silently ground himself even as he fought down the brief glow of magenta that came with the pounding of his heart and tremor in his hands.]

You have already stolen everything else from me, I’ll kill you long before you replace me in this family as you did ours. I’m not going to stand here and just let you ignore me to leave as if you’ve done nothing, Izunia.

[It's the imposter that makes him slacken his grip first, dumbfounded, but Ardyn drives the spike of doubt the rest of the way. The jealous king, the brother who stole the throne, stolen last namesake Ardyn had used for who knows how long--Izunia.

He'd seen...glimpses, before. Ardyn playing around with projection, never satisfied with his own flawed and extremely long memory. But this man looked like a damn double.

Holy shit. Twins.]

I kinda thought you'd be...bluer. [Church half remembers himself, moving to Ardyn's side instead of behind him, grabbing his hand--tightly.] Hey. It's fine, I just mistook him for you and told him to put that stupid outfit back. You wandered off, dumbass. If you get the cops on us in the middle of the mall, it's every man for himself. [Because leave it to Church to try and diffuse a situation with mild humor.]

[...Bluer? That's not a description he's ever gotten, especially given that he normally is the blue twin - blue Armiger and scarf to Ardyn's warmer colors.

He still wants to run. But he can't really deny Ardyn anything, not at this point, even without the threat of being gutted in the middle of the mall.

At least the creeping feeling of the Starscourge, barely contained, isn't there.]

...Fine, but let's at least get off the street. I doubt any of us wants that kind of attention.

[Because Church really isn't wrong about the whole bringing the cops down on their heads thing. Also, the woman who runs the overpriced cheese shop not far from here is way too nosy and probably already posting photos of her double-Ardyn sighting to SpaceBook.]

I've got a shop a few down from here. Just give me a minute's head start to send the part-timer home early.

... [Dumb humor or not it still got Ardyn to relax however slightly; there was still homicidal fury in yellow eyes fixed on the brother that was a mirror of what Ardyn had looked like as a human.]

Fine. But one wrong step and you’re bound to regret it.

Are we seriously doing this? Are we seriously doing this now? I know the holiday season is for airing out family dirty laundry and getting drunk and fighting each other, that's just tradition, but are we genuinely going to have a knock down drag out brotherly fight that's been building a couple years?

Are whole stores gonna collapse? Is there gonna be a crater here in an hour? Should I go put something on to keep blood from staining my clothes, or should I just grab popcorn instead?

I hope not, my insurance policy doesn't cover damage from angry relatives.

[Did he just...?

Anyway, Izunia makes it a point to stay in sight as he heads into - Well, exactly the shop they might be expecting him to head into, given that it's some kind of horrible "fake swords and possibly real antiques" kzitch place, the sort of one that you have no idea how it manages to support itself because the only customers are three teenage boys who clearly aren't buying anything.

They go out, and then Ardyn and Church will hear Izunia's voice, slightly raised - "Just go, Al, and take Caravaggio with you, I'll pay you the full shift anyway." - before one more person leaves. He's probably not quite human, from the faint gold shimmer of his skin, but he's maybe twenty-four and clearly the part-timer if only because he wears the "fashionable hobo" look nearly as well as Ardyn and Izunia. (Also, he's carrying a rather unhappy looking saber-toothed tortoise.)

When they enter, Izunia is triggering the close-up-shop blinds with a switch to give them privacy. Once that's down, he - rather blatantly - discards his mock-Ardyn outfit by directly swapping it to the Armiger in favor of a black dress shirt.]

Flip the sign and lock the door, would you?

I'm so thrilled you two find this funny. [Ardyn snapped that as he left Church to the matter of the door, not once taking his eyes off his brother like he expected a knife pulled at any second.]

Who the hell do you think you are, parading around as if all this is normal?!

Y'know, most people thought the humor thing was a point in my favor. [He huffs as he attends to the matter, and then leans his back against the door, arms crossed. Watching.]

I'm probably gonna punch you like at least once. [Fair warning.]

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