izunia lucis callout

[founderinglight]

you will pry twinzunia from my cold dead hands let's do this

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[motherfucking_ghost]

Wh--who the fuck else would you ask out but me?! And why can't I fight him, I'll fight him, I'll knock him out!

[founderinglight]

To be fair, it was you asking. Damn if that's not a man who knows exactly what he wants.

[Cough.]

You're not fighting me because I can still put more swords into you in thirty seconds than there are in this room.

[scourgingstars]

No one, dearest, it was a long time ago. And though it nauseates me to even say these words, my brother is right. If you can't beat me in training, you've no chance against either of us in an actual fight.

[motherfucking_ghost]

Well, then, you definitely can't fight Ardyn, either, fucko, cuz I'm his Shield, so if you did fight him, you'd probably have to kill me anyway, and then you'd be extra fucking dead. You'd be so dead you wouldn't have any kind of spirit-y afterlife to haunt in a ring, you'd just be obliterated in an instant, and my ghost'll get a ghost boner watching it happen.

[founderinglight]

...If I was really intent on it, I'd warp behind you and trip you. That usually works.

[scourgingstars]

He would, he learned that one from me.

[relax, church. have an arm back around your waist.]

But yes. If he puts a hand on you, I'll rip him apart.

[motherfucking_ghost]

Patience isn't my strong suit. I could wait 'til I've got muscles as big as my head, or maybe I could take a sword and sword him through for you. That's technically one shot.

Or I grab a fake sword and get him right in the nuts, that's always good for a laugh too. Less blood.

Or maybe I'm just a shitty Shield-in-name-only and if you ever get in trouble I'll be useless, there's that too.

[founderinglight]

Like you didn't steal just as many of my tricks.

[Oh, back in the days when they were brothers who shared everything and didn't bother to keep track.

They might never have that again. If he tries to force it, they'll definitely never have that again. Being able to at least laugh together again is a wonderful sign.]

Most things aren't going to be as dangerous as another Lucis Caelum. I'm sure you're doing fine.

[scourgingstars]

Hush, darling, you're an impeccable Shield. Notably, you're still here.

[bitter, nah.]

Though he does have a point. The line of kings is a special strain of danger in and of themselves.

[motherfucking_ghost]

Yeah, okay, well, I mean, yours was also with you how many years before fucking off. ...Wait, that's not the point I mean to make. That's not--I'm not gonna do that, I'm just saying--

Maybe I should stop saying. Yeah.

[founderinglight]

[Good fucking job, Church.

Izunia, meanwhile, is thoughtfully running his hand along the side of his neck, as though an idea just occurred to him.]

You've hardly spent a lifetime training for being a royal bodyguard the way most Shields have. And at this point, shielding his heart might be more important.

[Physically, Ardyn can take care of himself. Emotionally...]

[scourgingstars]

I love you dearly even with your inability to shut up.

[Ardyn rolled his eyes, tightening his hold on Church's waist.]

Brother, you could at least have the decency to not be quite so open about the emotional trauma that you gave me.

[motherfucking_ghost]

Beats beating around the bush about it and being coy. Everyone here is well aware of your...you-ness. And trauma and shit. Let's maybe not forget the trauma Bahamut gave you, aaaand the trauma you gave yourself, aaand the trauma of murdergame, too.

[founderinglight]

[Sorry Church Izunia is more sensitive than you. To continue the romantic notion, whether it's as a physical Shield or an emotional one, he has the ability to step right around you without trouble.]

... I'm sorry.

[scourgingstars]

...It's two thousand years too late for that to mean anything.

[motherfucking_ghost]

You did take his place, try to have him killed, like a lot, and then locked him up. [That Ardyn sometimes still wakes up terrified in the middle of the night, thinking the walls around him are stone, that he is utterly alone, twists a knot in Church's gut. He's there. Every time. To ease away the fears and troubles and guide him back to reality. And that's Izunia's fault.]

Kinda hard to get over. There aren't any apology flowers for something like that.

[founderinglight]

[Hey uh guys not that he doesn't deserve this, but - ]

I was more referring to what happened just now, considering. I know I can't fix the past but I am at least going to try and not grow the damn pile.

[scourgingstars]

Do forgive me, your mistakes are many and tremendous and it gets difficult to keep track.

[Casual as Ardyn sounded, his hand curled into an iron grip on Church's shirt at the mention.]

[motherfucking_ghost]

[mmmmmmm that's a big ol warning sign if church has ever felt on. fuck the snacks okay it's time to get serious about his boyfriend's emotional health. He rubs a hand in soothing circles across Ardyn's back.]

I think 'existing' is growing the pile. Just a smidge.

[founderinglight]

If neither of you is going to kill me, then I'm afraid existing is going to keep happening.

[He's trying. He's trying and he knows he deserves this but it doesn't make it less frustrating to want something so close so badly and know that it is still out of reach. And that's starting to show in the fraying of his mood, as well.]

[scourgingstars]

Leonard, relax; don't push it. As for you, I told you--you're still my brother. Even were I to want to kill you, I wouldn't.

...What are you planning to do now?

[motherfucking_ghost]

Then the fuck do you want to do, you don't wanna leave him here, you don't wanna take him with us, you don't wanna kill him but you hate him with every fucking fiber of your being, so what do you want, Ardyn? I will fucking make it a reality if you can just figure that out.

[founderinglight]

[You know what Church he's going to take a deep breath and completely fucking ignore you for a minute.]

...I don't know.

[Arrange a touch-up appointment for his tattoo, because after two thousand years it probably needs one? Go out and buy the traditional engagement wineglasses and figure out what the fuck kind of wedding gift says 'I love you in spite of trying to murder you'? Sell his life story to the press and use the resulting funds to buy you all a spaceship?]

I haven't exactly planned for any of this.

[scourgingstars]

Ssh, dear--be patient. It's not as simple as knowing what I want or what should be done here.

[Deep breath.]

It's not as if I planned for this myself. So we may as well figure it out in a fucking hurry, if I'm not going to level this place out of spite.

[motherfucking_ghost]

[It's frustrating (for someone with little patience to start with), because he wants to do something, anything, to fix this, and there is no fix. There's nothing for him but to be standing here like a physical anchor.

Because what he wants to say is of course it's that simple, what else could there be? But this--he's not sure he can truly understand it. Thousands of years of spite and hate and misery and...brotherhood. So he continues to glower at Izunia but, thankfully, keeps his mouth the fuck shut.]