lazybox | izunia lucis callout

Oh, yeah, you do not want to know what fandom is like these days, old man. People don't change, they just get way more public.

I can only imagine.

...And I say that as the identical twin of one of the most popular men in Solheim, so I leave you to figure out the kinds of propositions I got.

Lalala, I don't need to know, I don't need to think about it, I was already sharing an adjoining bathroom with him and Church, thanks.

[He's covering one of his ears. He's real mature.]

We understand each other perfectly, then.

[BEST NEPHEW.]

[He's Izunia's ONLY nephew.]

I'm pretty sure they didn't do it until after we burned the place to the ground, at least, but still. God. I know way more than I want to, about both of them.

[Look you never know where you adopt one there might be more.]

...That's more restraint than he typically possesses. Are you sure he's well?

Well, he still thought he was a container for all the world's shadowplague for most of the time till then, so. Don't worry, they're making up for it.

Good to know some things don't change...

God, I still can't believe Kip baked them a 'Congrats on the Sex' cake. They don't need encouraging, you useless green alien.

[Oh no he's just. Groaning and laughing and putting his face in his hands. This is how the King ends, not with a bang but with a giggle.]

[Junpei takes note of this, amused, and when it sounds like Izunia's calmed down a little, he adds:]

They make each other laugh, too. It's not all eye sex and innuendo. Not all the time, anyway.

[Tenmyouji Junpei loves his awful asshole family.]

[His awful asshole family sounds absolutely perfect to his awful asshole uncle, honestly.]

...I'm glad.

I can tell.

[He looks off at the scenery again.]

Anyway, we're still, uh, partially on the run from the bastards who kidnapped us, and partially hunting them down for murderous vengeance. Ehh, about fifty-fifty each way.

[Not much to see, really, big rocky volcanic mountainside. The distantly rising sun does cool things to the sky though.]

I'd offer a prayer for your success, but the gods and I aren't on speaking terms lately. You'll have to settle for me mundane hopes.

[No see that's pretty cool. He's been in space and then on a planet of grassy plains for a while. Topography. Nice.]

Like I said, Earth affords me the luxury of not believing in gods, so your hopes are fine. I won't even try to haggle you up to well wishes and cheers.

Don't be silly, those are free.

[Just pay shipping and handling.

Also did you want a chair because Izunia is deploying folding chairs.]

Fucking hell, I'd almost take gods for this extreme level of video game convenience.

[Just plunks happily in that chair and makes himself comfortable.]

Not really, but damn, man, if I could take my shit everywhere? I'd never have to build a bomb out of dry ice and a PVC bottle again. I'd have infinite lockpicks. Ice cream cake whenever I want. A bazooka.

I think I have a cake in here somewhere.

[He goes a little cross eyed, trying to concentrate, then frowns.]

Hmm, no, only a large tart, a couple eclairs, and some biscuits. I know I have lock picks, though.

[No comment on the bazooka.]

[Junpei lifts his eyebrows mildly.]

Your picks aren't gonna help me here. Do you see any doors?

[He waves at the wilderness.]

And it's probably not like I can take them with me. I'm not equipped with my own personal metaphysical hammerspace, you know.

...Slacking as usual, brother mine.

[Hey in the meanwhile here's one of those little tv tray table things with his cider from earlier, a couple chocolate covered biscuits on a plate, and some paper napkins.

He is prepared for ANYTHING.]

Oh, hel-lo!

[College appetite, activate. He's more than happy to get munching on these biscuits ASAP.]

Mmfh, thanks. 'S not Dad's fault, though, these things got something blocking most of his powers. [Up goes the arm with the PIP again before he lets it fall.] Can't tell if it works on mine or not, but I was never any good at that shit anyway.

[Yeah he knows what you twenty somethings are like he raised two of them.

Anyway that's shit luck, Junpei.]

I should have realized. Of course, if he had his full Armiger, there wouldn't be anything left of your enemies to hunt you down.

[He sounds SO FOND considering that they're talking about murder here.]

No kidding. Probably wouldn't be much left of us, either, though, since Church would've gotten a projectile weapon out of him some way or another and we'd all be fuck chili.

[...Izunia makes a face that says he's only understanding what the fuck 'fuck chili' is from context.]

Do try not to take yourselves down with your enemies.

No, wait, we'd be better off if he did try to shoot us. Maybe that's what I'll tell him if he ever does get his hands on another gun. Shoot at us, spare the enemy, bam, the problem solves itself. Haha!

[Junpei would've had a great time in Red vs. Blue.]

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founderinglight - 2018-01-24 00:01 (UTC) - Expand